the winds of change

So that's been the theme of our lives it seems for the last year. Well, it's been our secondary one. Jesus' love and care for us has been evident through it all. Through bringing our little prince home, 2 surgeries so far, schooling Joel for the first time and now, job changes.

"Redeeming love has been my theme and shall be till I die..."

{There is a Fountain Filled with Blood} 

God has been so faithful. He has redeemed our fears and our mistakes and our dreams. Many unknowns have weaved their way into our lives over the last several months and His faithfulness has been our constant. I really thought I mentioned this or maybe posted about it a little a few months ago, but I can't find it now. Doesn't matter really. 

Jase came home from China changed. Uneasy to a degree. Not changed by China per se. But he was unsettled. Time away had given him clarity. And to be honest, I didn't even see it. I knew that the weekly grind of youth ministry was wearing on him. In truth, parents wore on him sometimes, the student band wore on him {because he's not musically inclined}, planning events and trips and activities wore on my sweet husband. All of that I knew too well. But re-entry kicks your tail and sometimes when you're in the trenches of it, other blatant things pass you by. And this current struggle of Jase's slipped by me pretty much unnoticed. 

We've been in student ministry for more than 15 years. Thirteen of those have been full time. Before that, a part time position in seminary, before that an interim position and even before that...as intern for a youth pastor each summer. Our lives, our marriage and our geography has been driven by youth ministry {and by God of course}. We moved to TX four weeks after our wedding so he could attend  seminary and then three years later, with Master's Degree in hand, moved 1000 miles away for his first full time position. Then yet again, three years later, moved to where we are now...for students. To be used by the Lord in their lives. To come alongside of parents in helping to model Godly faithfulness for them to see and follow. To teach them His Word. To serve the Body. That was in early 2003.

A few years ago, after our minister of education moved to another job out of state, our church decided to increase Jason's responsibilities and added education ministry to his title. It was a win win in many ways. He had a salary increase and a new area of ministry to enjoy in addition to student ministry. It meant more work for him, but at this point, he welcomed it and enjoyed it very much. As the years rolled on, it proved to be a lot for him. He was juggling so much. Wearing countless hats {at least it felt that way}. And his passion began to wane. 

Enter China. 

And my love came home one Monday this past fall in tears. He had been to speak with our pastor, whom we adore, about how unsettled he was. How he felt the Lord leading him to a different role in ministry. How he desperately loved our church and didn't want to leave at all...but couldn't see himself continuing in youth ministry. 

That's a hard thing to do. We know our church loves us. Jase is tried and true, an excellent employee, so kind and approachable. He does his job well. But you never know what will happen in a conversation like this. Our pastor could have said that he needed to find a new church or denied his desire to shift focus. He could have been angry. Or hurt. Or just hard to deal with. 

He was none of these things.

Instead, he affirmed Jase. Even now that makes me cry. He told him how loved and valued he is. That there was no reason for him to leave or to feel that he needed to consider leaving. Praise God. 

So, long story short long, and after much prayer, our church developed a plan for Jase. He would become the Minister of Pastoral Administration and Discipleship  with some emphasis on Family Ministry too. Which, if you knew my love, you would say fit him perfectly. In November {I believe}, the church voted for this change in title and responsibilities as well as formed a search team for the new youth minister. I'm so pleased to say that the Lord has led us to that man and he will be joining us in a couple of weeks after a unanimous vote to call him to our church. 

Kennedy struggled most, as we fully expected she would. Jase told her on a Friday before announcing it to the rest of the students the following Sunday last fall. She sobbed, we right along with her. Jase scooped up his girl, held her tight, and wept with her. It breaks my heart that Syd won't have the blessing of sitting under her dad's teaching as a youth. Of course he teaches her daily here. But there's something different about being a PK at church when your dad is leading. So it's been hard. And as much as we've been looking forward to the change, this past Sunday night as he taught the students for the last time as their youth pastor, I couldn't help but cry myself. It certainly is bittersweet. 

In March, we celebrated 10 wonderful years of ministry at our church. They had an entire service for us where three former youth spoke {and did so beautifully} about Jase and his ministry's impact on their lives. We laughed and cried and laughed some more. It was a precious, precious time. They blessed us with a love offering {and a new iPad Mini for Jase that he has been dying for!} and they showered us with affirmation. 

The winds of change are definitely blowing in our lives. Y'all know I love change! And this one, while welcomed, is still a bit hard for me to swallow. Maybe because it means we're getting older! lol. Jase will be 40 in a few months. So I guess it's time we grow up out of the youth ministry. But this I know, students will always be dear to us. Don't make the mistake of thinking that teenagers aren't worthy of your time and your understanding. No one can make you laugh like a middle schooler. Or challenge your walk like a high schooler on fire for the Lord. Or bring you to your knees with their commitment like a college student who's entering the mission field for the fame of Jesus. Students are one of the best things about the Church. And if you haven't discovered that yet, you're surely missing out! 

Sweet students, we love you so much. Thank you for sharing your lives with us all these years. 

So that was really heavy...

Just wanted to pop in and say sorry. My last post was super heavy and I really try to be light here! I guess the pressure mounted and the students at school weren't so great today and Syd didn't sleep well at all last night and Jase has been sick all week and I'm so ready for this dumb election to be OVER...and....and...and.

Do you have weeks like this?  Sure you do . But I couldn't leave it this way tonight. I am going to lay in a super hot bath (is there another kind!?!), down some not so yummy but oh so effective Nyquil for the sore throat my husband so kindly shared with me, watch a little Colbert Nation and drift off into some fantastic slumber! And I wanted you to know that it's all good. Life goes on. And what's better is, none of us is in control of it. There's a plan. It's better than ours. We can rest in it and stake our lives on it. Let not your heart be troubled!

Sleep well and have a fabulous weekend! Take your kids to see some pumpkins! Watch your favorite college team throw the pigskin! Plant some pansies! Enjoy October! 

You all are the best!

Goodnight.

"...in view of His appearing..."

So I've been reading 2 Timothy each morning before the girls get up for school. Such a good book. For the last two days, I've kinda landed in chapter 4 verses 1-5. Here is what Paul says~

"In the presence of God and of Christ Jesus, who will judge

the living and the dead, and in view of His appearing and

His kingdom, I give you this charge: Preach the Word;

be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and

encourage-with great patience and careful instruction.

For the time will come when men will not put up with sound

doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around

them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears

want to hear. They will turn their ears away from the

truth and turn aside to myths. But you, keep your head

in all situations, endure hardship, do the workd of an

evangelist, discharge all the duties of your ministry.

2 Timothy 4:1-5

I have been so burdened by these verses for so many months. And while I didn't set out to read through them again this week...I've just been in 2 Timothy and so here they are again, right in my face. Not to mention that Jase has been teaching our students and parents along these lines for a few weeks now.

Here's my point~Even though Paul was writing to his "son in the faith", Timothy who was a young pastor...these verses are for all of us who a part of the body of Christ. Are you noticing what is happening all around us? Are you aware that people who are opposed to all that we hold dear are lobbying men and women whom we elected? Do you see that Hollywood actors with the morality of a brick are now the ones who are speaking out to tell us for whom and why we should vote? Can you imagine that we live in a country where our leaders lie more than they tell the truth? Are you watching churches (maybe even your own) trade sound doctrine for relevance? What has happened here?

I don't know about you, but I am brought to my knees by verse 1 of this chapter. In the presence of Jesus...in view of His appearing...do these things. Have we forgotten that this world and everything in it is going away? That He could come at any moment? I think Paul's message to us here is, 1)be ready~ for His return and to give an answer for the hope we have. Also, stand up. Be a voice. Speak out. And 2)Watch out! Be on guard! Look around you! These verses are coming to life right before our eyes. The time is now when men won't put up with sound doctrine. It is today that their ears are itching and someone is happy to step up and tickle them with anything but the Gospel. Hold fast, though! Because Paul tells Timothy, "But you, keep your head in all situations,..." and basically, do the work that God has called and given you to do.

Sorry. I'm just tired. Physically and every other way. Aren't you? And reading these things from God's Word makes me weary of this world. 

But I know the one in whom I have put my trust, and I'm convinced that he is able to protect what he has entrusted to me until the day that he comes.

2 Timothy 1:12

Thanks for letting me get it all out.

Love you all.

Busy Saturday

So today we had our youth leadership over for a "kNOw Youth" day. We met from 9:30 until around 3:30 at our house and had a really good time. We talked about our philosophy of ministry and how to involve parents, planned some small events for fall and shared our views of how things are going. We discussed what success in ministry should look like, particularly youth ministry. It's so hard to be a youth pastor or leader today...our teenagers are more busy, more entertained, more over stimulated than any other time in history. And sadly, the statistics say that somewhere between 60-88% of them will leave the church during college. Could it be that we're missing something? What if parents became the primary disciplers of their children? What if we spent more energy equipping parents and encouraging them to this end? What would our youth ministries look like if this became our goal? And what in the world will the church of Jesus look like in 15 years if we don't? We had revival last week and the topic each day was Parenting and lies that parents tell themselves. It was excellent and so timely. So much of what was said has been on our hearts (and many friends of ours hearts) for years. 

Jason struggled for several years to fit the youth ministry mold. He would lie awake at night and talk to me about how to reach kids and how he just couldn't get away from the fact that he was supposed to teach the Word and be faithful to it. And in the last 5-6 years he has had such a conviction that it's not about numbers or really even faithfulness of students' attendance to church. It's not about games or ice breakers. And it's surely not about baby sitting and providing something good for students to be involved in. Even though some of things have their place on occasion. It's really all about Jesus and His church. Our success in ministry will be measured by two things...

Did we graduate students from our ministry 

who are passionate 

about Jesus, 

His Word, 

and His church?

And did we equip them to do so 

while we had the opportunity 

so that when they enter adulthood 

they will serve Jesus and His church?

It's a big deal. It's a huge undertaking. It's completely Biblical. Because they will leave our ministry. And when they do, if all we've given them is a great 6-7 years in the youth group...what will they cling to? Where will they place their hopes and who will they turn to when those hopes are dashed? 

Of course we are not responsible for being the primary disciplers of most of our teenagers. That mandate was given to parents in Deuteronomy. And it is a common thread through the entire Bible. My friend always tells me..."No one will out influence us in our kids' lives. We won't allow it. We have to be the primary influence." She is right, of course. And by the same token, no one should have the primary role of discipling our children but us. But our role as youth leaders is to partner with parents. To encourage. To equip. Then, when our students leave us, they will have a foundation to stand on in this world. They will have seen Godliness modeled in their lives by the people who know them best and love them most. 

Sorry about that. This is just our life. It was a really good day.

But we heard that a sweet lady in our church went to Jesus this morning. She struggled with alzheimer's for several years. And today, she went home! Her granddaughter is like a daughter to Jase and I. She's the student that knocks on your door at 10:30 and says, "hey, you up?"   Or calls when she thinks of you or writes "I just love you" on your Facebook wall. We absolutely adore her. And her sweet grandmother went to Heaven today. So we went to the funeral home tonight and even laughed a bit with her and some other students that we just love so much. It was good to go, good to laugh and love. But tomorrow is another day and as much as they are resting in the fact that their mom and grandmom is safe and sound now...it will be a hard day. So that leads me to prayer requests...

Please pray for our sweet Morgan & her entire family as they grieve.

Please pray for one of my sweet 6th graders whose 1st Volleyball game is Monday.

Please pray for a job opportunity that my dad is being considered for.

Please pray for one of our students who has committed to serve Jesus abroad in Southeast Asia for 2 years.

Please pray for my friend who transitions into a new position Monday as a lead teacher

at her kids' school this year.

Please praise the Lord with us for the news we received about Joel this week and thank Him for the provision He has given and the peace He brings.

We love you all,

Kam

For you, Morgan. We love you! :)

Woe To You

So like I said in an earlier post, God has been wrecking me with a certain Truth for about a year now. I am bombarded day after day and week after week. And it's precious. I am always amazed at the thought that the Holy Spirit would love us to the extent to convict us. Not just of our sin. But our need to be about His work. How sweet to include us. Obviously He could (and in reality does...) accomplish all things by Himself. But He chooses to speak to us on behalf of the Father and His will for our lives. To love people. To meet needs. To be the hands and feet of Jesus. What a blessing to be included. To be counted among His children. To have a purpose.

Jase told me about a song yesterday by Matt Papa. If you don't know of him, chances are...you will soon. We were sitting at our kitchen table having lunch together and Jase told me about the song "Woe To You". He probably didn't even realize it, but his eyes were a little teary just telling me about the lyrics. He said, "Babe, this is what you've been talking about all this time. You've got to hear it." He came home again later that afternoon and played it for me. Holy cow. It is a really hard song to take in. But Matt just heaps Truth upon Truth here.

He talks about what we do, as believers. And the things we should be about doing. At Passion, I was so convicted two years ago with their "Do Something Now" campaign. Social injustice. Hungry children. Human trafficking. Countries and whole people groups with no Bible in their language. I've been asking God what it would look like in my life if justice and worship merged. Seriously. It sounds silly, doesn't it? As believers...we should " do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with our God." Micah 6:8 What does that look like? Justice and mercy should go hand in hand with worship. If it's not...something is wrong. Something is missing. WE'RE missing something. "The second greatest is like the first. Love your neighbor as yourself..." Matthew 22:39

This song also speaks volumes to today's church. I have also been troubled a lot by pastors who aren't preaching Truth anymore. It bothers me so much. I listen to sermons that are more self help than Biblical. Not that what they are saying isn't good stuff. I would agree with most of it. It's just the method..."preaching" on how to be a better parent or spouse or have a better bank account instead of giving their congregation meat. A Scripture verse's reference on the screen instead of reading from God's Word and expounding on it. Then the motive..."to be relevant and make people comfortable". I just feel sick when I hear this from pastors. What could anyone say to their sheep that is more relevant than Scripture? I don't get it.


I know that this is a heavy post. Sorry. It's just what is on my heart today. It's where I've been sitting all these months. Convicted. Challenged. I hope it does the same for you. I hope God does the same to you. You can find Matt's cd and this song on iTunes or you can use the link here to download three songs for FREE from his website.

www.mattpapa.com

Woe To You

Religious people

You white wash tombs

You're beautiful on the outside

But you're full of bones

You look very religious

You follow all your little rules

But you don't follow Jesus

You just talk like you should

Woe to you

Woe to you

All your pretty words

Sound like filthy rags

Woe, woe to you

Prosperity and progress

You say "bless me indeed!"

You fill up your bank accounts

While children die in their need

Yeah, one day you'll retire

You'll have a house on the sea

Oh, but my friend where your treasure is

That's where your heart's gonna be

Woe to you

Woe to you

You call him "Lord"

But he's just your genie

Woe, woe to you

Oh, where is the justice?

Who's preaching the Truth?

Your sermons are entertaining

And your churches are cool

You're grieving His Spirit

And you're winning the lost

To a worthless religion

'Cause you don't talk about the cross

Woe to you

Woe to you

Your gospel is tickling our ears to death

Woe, woe to you

Where is the justice and mercy

And walkin' humbly with your God?

Who's caring for orphans and widows

And living holy in this world?

For this is what He requires

Woe to you

Woe to you

"For many will come to Him on that day

And say, 'Lord, Lord' "

But He'll say, "Woe, woe to you."

Woe to you

Woe to you

Oh, repent before it's too late

Woe

May we be found faithful.

Love you all,

Kam